Sidewalk Superheroes

Well, I’m afraid I’ll have to start out with the sad news. Bat A wrote me this morning through MySpace and said that he’s leaving for who knows how long. He’d mentioned before that he would have to go back to the motherland for a bit, but it sounds like the visit was extended and pushed forward, because things are just getting too ugly down here. It was a very sweet letter, especially considering the fact that he’s found this blog (hello, dear!), and it made me sad in a very bittersweet way. While I thought he was just being cranky or maybe avoiding me, being silly and egocentric, he’s apparently been going through a lot behind the scenes, so I’d just like to say that all the cranky bits I’d written in the past are moot and he will always and forever be my Batman. I’m sorry we won’t be able to work together, but I’m so happy we had the time on the boulevard that we did, that I met him, and that we’ll hopefully keep in touch while he gets a much needed break. I’ll miss him terribly.

*sigh* A sad way to start the day, but I’m sure the break will do him good. I hope he does come back while Catwoman and I are still thick in this business, but if not, I’ll gladly make a comeback if he does. He’s one of the few characters I genuinely like, both as a character and on their own as a person, so this is a big blow. Still, stiff upper lip, and know that it’s what’s best for him.

So yesterday I didn’t work. I had a new stereo put into the car so I can listen to my iPod (yay!), and ended up playing around with those all day. Today I went in kinda late, because I’ve been lazy lately, and Vader and Storm Trooper were out. I joined up with them and it was good, brisk business. The weather was nearly hot, and I actually felt a little naked with just one pair of tights and one shirt under my Padmé costume. I had to keep checking my bottoms to make sure I’d put on underwear. Weird, I know. We didn’t move much, which is how they like to work, and they’re popular enough so that the crowds come to them, so it works out.

Shortly after I got there Storm Trooper warned me about the cops. They’d been haunting the boulevard since Freddie’s beating, though they seem more keen on harassing the characters standing still and taking photos, rather than watching unruly crowds or cracking down on the wannabe rappers selling CDs and DVDs on the street without a permit, as the trooper pointed out. The woman cop, the one who arrested Homer

had apparently been standing just out of Trooper’s line of sight, and when a group of tourists approached him, asking how the tips work and what was expected, he said, “You know, like a dollar a character.” Immediately she jumped in and read him the riot act, warning that if he mentioned money at all again around her, she’d cuff him. I guess this is sort of a legal gray area, but everyone I know does this. We say, “We work for tips [or donations], is that okay?” and people say yes or no. If we’re working as a group, then we add, “Something per character,” so we don’t get the “Here, split this dollar between four of you” bullshit. Sometimes that’s not clear enough for people, and they ask, “How much is a tip?” We can’t set a price per character or per picture because that can be considered aggressive panhandling, so we make suggestions. “Most people tip $1 per character,” something like that, adding that it’s up to them. I mean, they ask and we have to say something!

It was just annoying, and sort of put most characters in a bad mood. The cops had been babysitting us, making us move a foot forwards or back or say this or not say that, all weekend, and there’s nothing bigger going on in Hollywood? The people in costumes are the ones getting beaten, not doing the beatings, but she just seems to have it in for the victims. Today Storm Trooper told me why.
“She’s got a vendetta,” he said.
“Oh? I thought she was new?” The veteran characters had mentioned that she and her partner were new on the beat, so this was news to me.
“Yeah, she was one of the cops that arrested Batman, and I think she broke her wrist in the arrest.”
“What?!?”
“Yeah, Max got a little violent and she got hurt. Ever since then, I think she’s had a thing against us.”
“So he was arrested on the boulevard?” In costume too? So much of this is unknown to me!
“Yeah, it got pretty crazy,” Storm Trooper said. Well, that would explain the dislike.

I keep forgetting how close we are to New Year’s. Today all the Penn State supporters were out, and I think Pennsylvania has been abandoned so they could all be out here for the Rose Bowl and Parade. Channel 7 came to the boulevard and filmed some segments with Scary Catwoman and Vader:

But going back to the cops and the fights, Storm Trooper also gave me more background into how all of this seemed to have started. Tinkerbell was out today, and while I don’t remember having seen her as anything else, she only comes out sporadically.
“She’s responsible for all this,” Trooper said, gesturing towards Tink.
“What do you mean?”
Apparently, some of the rappers had been sexually harassing Tink, and Bat A and some of the other guys had stepped in to protect her. The rappers hadn’t taken kindly to this, and had started fighting with the guys. Since most are distinctive, once a character is jumped, he’s “marked” and isn’t safe in that costume ever again. If they know his face, even worse. If this is all true, it’s a damn shame. The ladies should be able to stand on a sidewalk without being groped or harassed with filthy words, and when asked to stop, the assholes had better shut their mouths.
Weirdly enough, Storm Trooper was angry with Tink.
“She should have her own back,” he said disgustedly. “All the other women here would’ve told those guys to shut up –”
“– or moved,” I interjected. I may still be new, but I know to do that much, at least.
“Right, exactly. But instead she just let Bat A step in for her and he got beat for it. And now he’s marked because of her, and she didn’t even thank him.” I don’t know the whole thing, and I doubt he does either, but this is just crap all around. Most characters don’t like the rappers because they’ll push people away and work the crowds around popular characters, and the rappers don’t like the characters because we don’t want to be associated with panhandlers. I’ll say hi to the guys as I walk by in costume, but they’re far too pushy for me and just annoying. I’m so damn tired of guys coming up to me on the street, or in parking lots, any place they can, and trying to pressure me into liking their music and making me buy it. Nothing anyone ever says or does will make me like music I don’t like, especially rap. If your music is so great, do what every other musician in the world does: play live shows, open for bigger groups, promote your music legitimately, get it on iTunes. It’s just not right, and they’re causing trouble when there doesn’t need to be.
So there’s that, from Storm Trooper’s point of view.

Wonder Wig showed up later in the day, still trying to work Catwoman, though there were no Batmans around to work with her and the Joker was doing fine on his own. She seems to be getting quite chummy with the panhandlers like Elmo (yes, the one with the arrest record) and all of his cousins who apparently work there as well. Weird situations all around. Anyway, Vader said that Wonder Wig had brought her mom around the other day in costume, and was apparently trying to get her in on the action too. I laughed, thinking that it was some sort of bizarre joke or an over exaggeration, but half an hour later, her mom was indeed there. She looked just like her daughter, only older, and thankfully she was in street clothes. Wonder Mom hugged Elmo and Mr. Incredible and the rest of that group, so it looks like Wonder Wig has gone to the dark side. Fine by me.

Oh, speaking of going to the dark side, there’s this fellow that comes around and will hang out with the Star Wars crowd. I have no idea what his name is, or even what to call him, but Vader says he calls him Goofus, so I guess that’s what I’ll call him. This guy is a bit slow, and has an accent on top of what might be a speech impediment, so it’s a bit hard to understand him. He’s nice though, and I have no problem with him, so we talk. Well, mainly Goofus will talk and I’ll nod my head. Today he was in a particularly chatty mood and decided to quiz me, as Padmé, about my motivations and actions from Episodes I-III. Luckily I’m a dweeb and watched those films way too much, so I had all the answers, but man, it was tiring. Occasionally Vader would drape an arm over my shoulder and ask, “So where is he now in the story?” Apparently Goofus likes to just tell the whole Star Wars epic. I guess today he was in interactive story mode. He keeps promising (or threatening?) to come out in one of his many costumes, and even pulled a Spiderman mask from his pocket, but I doubt he ever will. He seems to aspire to be a boulevard character, but I actually hope he never does. The men especially need to be tough out there and get a lot of shit, and I know this poor guy just can’t handle it. I don’t want to see him get hurt out there.

The mood was odd today because of all that, so sorry for the seriousness of this post. To lighten the mood, Jesus showed up with an iced coffee from Starbucks:

Of course, we were total heathens and made all sorts of Biblical jokes. I asked if he could turn his frappuccino into wine.