Sidewalk Superheroes

Today sucked a bit less than yesterday, which was good. After about fifteen minutes on the boulevard today I wanted to go back home crying, but I’m sure a big part of it is because I’m really introverted and shy and groups of catty sluts like to gang up on me when I’m alone. (“How can you be introverted with a mouth like that?” you may ask, to which my answer is, “Words are my defense.”)

Before I launch into today’s craziness, let’s take a moment to relax and enjoy the random bits of beauty in Hollywood:

Snapped that on the way into work today. I like how Hollywood keeps a bit of the old Art Deco neon laying around. That’s what makes it so much nicer than LA, who just lets everything rot or plows over it for ugly concrete boxes. Anyway . . .

I parked and snuck up to the boulevard to see what was going on before I changed. I snuck past Wonder Wig, still in her cheap Catwoman regalia, and I don’t think she recognized me. I said hi to Storm Trooper and Vader, and it was really crowded and they said business was good, so I ran back to the car and changed real quick. When I got back up, however, I noticed the Slut Sisters out and had a bad feeling. The Slut Sisters consist of all the generic slutty outfits: Sexy Cop, sexy nurse, Slutty Catwoman, sexy [fill in the blank]. Whatever can be done cheaply and store bought while showing off loads of flesh, they do it. These are also the catty women who don’t seem to like Catwoman and I, though we’ve never really talked to them and I know we haven’t done anything against them. Well, except unintentionally flirting with Sexy Cop’s husband, but in our defense no one ever told us they were married and they sure don’t advertise it. Anyway, Bat T was out and I stopped by to say hi and we got to talking. It looked like we were going to work together, which would really help a Batgirl out, but then Slutty Catwoman came up and said, “Could you work with me for a while?” to him. Since he knew her better and she asked, he said okay and she pulled him away from me. Not very far, mind you, just far enough so that I could watch all the work they were getting while standing alone. I know that Slutty Catwoman is in deep with Sexy Cop, so I don’t think it’s a stretch to say her finger was in that pie.

I turned and told Storm Trooper what just happened, and he said, “Oh, Crackwoman?” It’s some consolation to know that the cool, sane characters dislike the people that seem to keep rubbing us the wrong way. It’s like validating my feelings against them. Feeling like crap, I decided to sneak past Bat T and Slutty Catwoman and try my luck in front of the Chinese Theatre. There I met Denim, Dutch Marilyn, Charlie Chaplin (there’s a creepy homeless Charlie that looks a lot like an ex-boyfriend of mine, but I never really have anything to say about him, so he’ll stay nameless for now). Charlie came over and admired the new costume, and asked how it was going. I admitted that it was still slow on my own and that all the Bats were being stolen away by the Slut brigade, and he offered to work together. That was terribly sweet of him, and I got some business that way. Eventually a Spiderman showed up, one who doubles as a very odd Captain Marvel, so I call him Captain Spiderman. Charlie suggested we work together so I could do better, and CS agreed.

We stuck around the theatre for most of the time we were there, and a couple of minor fights broke out. First, Wonder Wig and Scary Catwoman (a very tall, Amazonian, very intimidating Catwoman of the Halle Berry vein) ended up too close together, and words were traded. From what I could tell Wonder made the mistake of wandering over into Scary’s territory, and Scary set her straight. *snigger* Wonder’s going to find out very soon that those with common sense don’t impinge on others’ territory. None of the Bats were working with her, either, and I saw her at one point lamely swinging her whip next to Holiday Barbie. Why there’s a Holiday Barbie I’ll never know, but there you are. Thankfully, she didn’t ask to work together, though maybe she can pick up on the fact that I’d rather stab myself in the eye with a spork than work with her when she’s in high backstabby mode. Even Denim left her alone today. I’d like to think that maybe I guilted him a little. 🙂 Here’s the exchange:
“Hello, luv, how are you today?”
“Fine, thanks. You replaced one Catwoman for another very easily!”
“Oh now! She was cold and I could help her out. I’m a nice guy with a big heart and I couldn’t let her freeze.”
“Oh, I’m just teasing.” I then told him about the very cute picture of him and the real Catwoman that’s turned up recently, and he promised to take a look and send her a sweet message. So Denim is still on the right side. We went on a drink run with Wonder Wig but lost her somewhere along the way, no big deal. She complained bitterly when we found her later, but I knew she stopped to try and steal pictures from the large crowd around Vader, Storm Trooper and Optimus Prime, so it’s her own fault. Oh, she also wore a black hooded thermal under her tank corset, which looked a bit funny. I couldn’t sneak a picture because it was so crowded and I can’t be obvious, so maybe tomorrow.

Second fight was Charlie Chaplin vs. the Asian tourists. I didn’t hear all of the exchange at the time, but he came over and vented afterwards, and it all came down to the tourists trying to stiff him. What I did hear of the conversation, though, was Charlie nearly shouting, “I would never go to your country and do that to you! That’s disrespectful, and they wouldn’t allow it in your country!” Erm. I hope I’m not ever that desperate over an extra dollar or two, though if the economy doesn’t improve soon…

Okay, enough cattiness. I don’t want to be all bitterness, but it’s a little hard to not snipe back when you feel it at your heels all day. While the money side of business still needs to improve, at least my face is getting out there. Before Bat T was stolen away, a film crew came up surveying characters about which album they preferred: Michael Jackson’s “Thriller,” or Prince’s “Purple Rain.” They came up to me and I chose “Thriller,” “Because I hang out with Michael all the time,” I said.
“Do you now?” the interviewer laughed.
“Oh yeah, we do karaoke together.”
“Have you been over to his place?”
“Oh god no! That monkey isn’t trained.”
From there he moved on to Bat T, who also chose “Thriller”:

As the group moved down the walk, I snuck behind one of the guys and snapped a picture of the URL on the back of his t-shirt, so I know that this is for Ill Street Blues Clothing. If you’re interested you can cast your own vote here, and if a video surfaces soon, I’ll post that too.

Later on in the day, two girls came up to me and started asking questions about character work. Looking back, I guess it was a sort of interview, and I don’t know if one of their friends was filming or not, but they asked about how I came to be there, what it was like, how good or bad the pay was, and how crazy it was. I mentioned that it was so crazy Catwoman and I had started this here blog, and she asked for the address. I gave it, and she said she would be sure to check it out, which I hope she does! It’s a lot of reading, but there’s craziness packed into every bite.

I only ended up staying four hours, because I was already tired and didn’t want to spend money on food, and I certainly didn’t want to be stuck on the boulevard after dark with the Slut Sisters. They tend to be even worse then, and their boys show up to do the dirty work for them, which is not what I want or need. Don’t you just love how all the people who feel they’re so wronged think nothing of unfair fights, and gangs against a single person? Lovely.

My view on the ride home. The view from that rooftop is amazing, by the way. I was up there for my 21st birthday.

P.S. Forgot to mention this earlier, but I had a recurring theme that totally made the day worthwhile for me. Today, for the first time that I’ve ever really noticed, really cute guys were checking me out! And I don’t just mean a glance and raised eyebrows when walking by, I mean looking back over his shoulder, nearly walking into a tree checking out. Oh, it felt so good. 😀 I don’t usually get that, so I have to enjoy it when it happens.